Am I paranoid, hyper-sensitive or just untrusting?
The other day I was struggling with my shopping. Dragging a wheeled container down some stairs, when a charming young lady offered to help me. My first re-action was an urban mugging. I immediately thought of losing my shopping. I smiled nervously, refused help with as much civility as I could manage and muttered "Thank you" more relieved than grateful.
After a while, the thought came to me that I must look more decrepit than I feel, I needed a new coat, I must stop struggling with shopping, I should not refuse help, do I look confused, bewildered, down at heel, do I need new shoes?
I said all this to my daughter who then told me that there are nice people in the world and I am really ok..... Walter
Wednesday, 28 January 2009
Tuesday, 27 January 2009
Counselling and Mediation
When I first entered a class at Mary Ward I always felt very self conscious as I thought I'd encounter a lot of young people and at my age I didn't want to make a fool of myself. Normally I get on with young people and in mediation you get a mixture of ages. Mediation is the reason I joined the counselling class and I felt it would enhance my mediation skills.
This class highlights the structure of counselling, listening, reflecting-back and feedback. I feel that positive regard is the way that the counsellor approaches his cases. For example, with empathy, having genuine regard for the feelings of those in need of counselling, accurately reading the signs of distress, not leading or advising but letting the patient come to a sensible conclusion by way of sensitive questioning.
Counselling in one sense is like mediation except that usually counselling it is one to one. In mediation more that one disputant can be involved. But the same feelings and method can be used in both cases. For example, overseeing the situation, standing back and letting the conversation flow, asking careful open questions to draw out the relevant information so that the client’s emotions are responded to and a true picture can emerge. It is important to listen to your own gut feeling. This skill can help you know the whole situation, and be used as a guide to bring your patient the relief they seek.
I liken the counsellor or mediator sessions to a conductor of an orchestra where he weaves the musical pieces with his body, arms and emotional and physical awareness of himself and the other person.
I enjoyed the course very much. I learnt so much and I know it made me a much better mediator for participating in these classes.
Peggy
This class highlights the structure of counselling, listening, reflecting-back and feedback. I feel that positive regard is the way that the counsellor approaches his cases. For example, with empathy, having genuine regard for the feelings of those in need of counselling, accurately reading the signs of distress, not leading or advising but letting the patient come to a sensible conclusion by way of sensitive questioning.
Counselling in one sense is like mediation except that usually counselling it is one to one. In mediation more that one disputant can be involved. But the same feelings and method can be used in both cases. For example, overseeing the situation, standing back and letting the conversation flow, asking careful open questions to draw out the relevant information so that the client’s emotions are responded to and a true picture can emerge. It is important to listen to your own gut feeling. This skill can help you know the whole situation, and be used as a guide to bring your patient the relief they seek.
I liken the counsellor or mediator sessions to a conductor of an orchestra where he weaves the musical pieces with his body, arms and emotional and physical awareness of himself and the other person.
I enjoyed the course very much. I learnt so much and I know it made me a much better mediator for participating in these classes.
Peggy
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