Excuses

We all make excuses as part of our daily life. We are late...excuse. We forgot to feed the cat...excuse. We forgot to water the plants...excuse ... and so forth. Then there is the extraordinary excuse... leaves on the line for the late train, for example.

On Saturday 14th Nov. the weather was vile. No Guardian newspaper was delivered to my local newsagent. He apologises in spite of the fact that there was nothing that he could do about it. When I asked what happened, he said "It's the weather, call back in half an hour". Half an hour later the paper had been delivered but without the magazine. He explained this was due to the rain.

A young friend of mine (after a hard night) phoned his boss next morning and explained that he would not be at work as he was unable to find his shoes!

Walter V.

Off my trolly!

Having struggled for years carrying a shopping basket provided by the store I was using at the time, the other day I thought I'd be brave and get one of the trolleys to use. I went to get one and hadn't a clue what to do! A very nice lady came to my assistance and away I happily went.

What I did not realise was they have a mind of their own. I think that one trolley was against me from the start. It took me (not the other way round) out onto the pavement full of little children in buggies and old ladies and started to career wildly all over the place amid much shouting and cursing. Eventually I managed to curb the beast.

Having almost run over an old man sitting on the pavement with his cap beside him full of coins and reducing a toddler to tears by banging into his buggy and causing his teddy to fall overboard, I eventually reached safe haven and did my shopping though worrying all the time that I had do the reverse journey to return the beast to its stall.

All was well eventually, but I will use a basket in future!

Mad security - update

I posted a blog...Mad security...on 21st October (2009).

There is some sense in the system and I am delighted to announce that the item (harpoon) arrived safely at the Museum in Toronto.

The universe is not entirely mad...just a little insane on occasion.

Walter V

Mad security

This is a tale of mad security or security gone mad or the ultimate avoidance of risk. The Eskimo (Inuit) peoples of the Arctic used to hunt seals through the ice. They waited at a "blowhole" and harpooned the seal when it came to the hole to breathe. The harpoon , and all the attachments, were made of bone.

I acquired a harpoon with all the attachments some forty years ago, (how this came about is another story), and now wished to donate it to the Royal Ontario Museum in Canada. They were delighted to receive this artifact and I carefully boxed it and arranged to send it to Canada via a reputable carrier.

I declared the item as an historical artifact that was being returned to its country of origin. Imagine when to my surprise (chagrin) none of the carriers would take the parcel because it was a dangerous weapon, that is a harpoon!

One carrier was persuaded to transport the item but it has not yet arrived at its destination and has still got to surmount the customs and excise barrier on both sides of the Atlantic ... Watch this space!

Walter V.

An epic journey

Having written a post a few weeks ago in praise of the documentary, The Frankincense Trail, and having seen two of the episodes, I turned on the television ready for the last one.

It was just as enjoyable as before and Kate as charming and tactful as she always is. When the end of her journey drew nigh and the midnight mass was about to start, the excitement in the church could almost be felt.

The Patriarch arrived with much pomp in magnificent splendour and proceeded to put the incense, that Kate had carried for so many miles with her, into the thurible and then started the Mass in earnest having blessed the altar.

How pleased Kate must have been to feel that her journey had such a successful ending.

And now, I at least know where frankincense comes from!

Polly

Antidote to gloom

I seem to be surrounded by GLOOM. Gloom is everywhere, global gloom, then there is autumnal gloom and something called SAD which comes with Christmas. So, I say, lighten up a bit, take precautionary measures to counteract gloom. I recommend any activity, provided it is done badly, strive for incompetence and above all read nonsense verse thus:

There was an old person whose habits
Induced him to feed upon rabbits;
When he'd eaten eighten,
He turned amazingly green,
And thus he relinquished those habits.

For copyright reasons the above has been cribbed from A book of nonsense (Everyman's Library) Walter V

French President on Economic Growth

President Sarkozy and his views on Economic Growth and Prosperity seem genuine and to find out more about the economic growth and cycles, he has recruited two Nobel Prize winners on economic growth. The two eminent professors are Amartya Sen and Joseph Stieglitz.

He is a proud French man and likes to see France come out the recession and his people have a high standard of living. But how do you measure growth? Some would say when the house prices start picking up, some say when the unemployment start falling, some say when there is a balance of payment surplus, and many other views. But Dr Sen is well known for his views philosophical, ethical and balance between market economy and social justice. As President Sarkozy wants to be the president of all the people he wants to combine his views on growth on prosperity, social justice and less gap between have and have not’s. Beautiful wife Carla Bruni by his side he is determined to make his mark as one of the great French Presidents